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As Told by Little Red Riding Hood

Mother, you won't believe what all happened to me today! I was on the way to Grandmother's house; like you asked, when all of a sudden, a BIG - MEAN - UGLY - BAD WOLF jumped out onto the path --- right in front of me! I wasn't scared though. Well, maybe a little.

Anyway, in a rough voice, he asked me "Where are you going, little girl and what's in the little basket of yours?" I told him that I was on the way to Grandmother's house because she wasn't feeling very well today and that I have soup and crackers in the basket that will make her feel all better. Then I said good-day to Mr. Wolf and started to walk away. Mr. Wolf got all huffy and puffy and ran away so fast that all the leaves blew down off of all of the trees in the forest!

A little farther down the path, I heard some strange squeal-like cries and whatever was making the sounds - they were getting close to me very fast. So I hid in the bushes. As soon as I could see what was making the sounds, I jumped right out! I probably shouldn't have done that, because I scared them even more.

They squealed loudly and said, "Don't hurt us - please!" I said "I won't hurt you little pigs. Why are you crying?" I felt so badly for them. One little pig said, "There was a BIG - MEAN - UGLY - BAD WOLF back there!" Another little pig said, "And he blew down all of our houses!" The third little pig said, "Except mine, but I'm too scared to go back into my house that's made of bricks! Surely that will fall too!" I said, "Hmm... that description sounds familiar! Little pigs, a brick house is a very strong house, so don't be afraid of that Big Bad Wolf! All of you should go to your brother's home. You'll be safe. Put some hot water on to boil in the fireplace and make some soup. It'll make you feel all better! In fact, that's what I'm taking to my Grandmother right now!" They liked my idea and hurried home. 

So I continued forward - down the path - to Grandmother's house - that was where I was going. Then I came up to a man that had on a flannel shirt with an axe. It was so shiny, but it had a dent in it. I asked him, "Sir, why is there a dent in your axe?" He said, "All the better to make hand-hewn timbers." I thought to myself, "That's all wonderful and dandy, but what in the world is hewn?" I didn't let him know that I had no clue what "hewn" was though. I smiled and said, "I'm Little Red Riding Hood" and then went on my merry way.

So, I finally reached Grandmother's house. The door was cracked. I thought that was a bit odd, but I knocked, because it's the polite thing to do. A rough and familiar voice called out, "Who's that knocking at my door?" Faintly, I said, "Why it's me, Little Red Riding Hood, and I've brought some soup and crackers for you that will make you feel all better." Then I went in. All tucked under the covers, I heard, "Come closer." I did.

Guess what? It wasn't Grandmother at all! It was the BIG - MEAN - UGLY - BAD WOLF! He jumped out of bed and gobbled me up. It didn't hurt though, because he didn't have any teeth. He had to swallow me whole. I wasn't lonely in his belly, because he'd already eaten Grandmother. And wow, she was looking rather sick. I gave her the soup and crackers. She said that she didn't have any appetite and looked all green.

All of a sudden, Grandmother and I were sprung out of his belly and onto the floor. He said not to look back, so we didn't. Then he told us to come back here and wait. So we did and... I wonder who that is at the door. It's the man with the dented axe!

Wow! What a lovely gray and red rug! And it's made of fur! My favorite!

The End

This monologue has been modified with permission from ProCW.